Siti Nur Amalina

Updates

2011-12-21T03:35:00.002+08:00

HELLO!

I am back on iPhone! :D

Missed posting here. Life's a bitch as usual. Been busy with many different phases in life. Oh my, how much I missed updating this little baby. Rollercoaster ride again and again is thrilling and saddening. You never knew what to expect. It's DECEMBER baby! Last posted on April! So many months gone and i'm kind of changed. Well, i just hope things will turn out to be better now.

I met someone new in life. Nice person, simple and most importantly, understanding. Relationships are bulid with trusts and understandning. I really hope this will last long. I'd had enough nonsense in relationship and being single for 6 months really taught me well enough to equipped myself to a better beginning. Insya'allah things will go well and may Allah be by my side always.

Regards,

Amal :D

Mistake

2011-04-05T07:53:00.003+08:00

This mistake is unforgivable to self. Oh my...What have I done? I don't want to wreck your new relationship. Damn it, Amalina! You ought to apologize! I need to clarify everything to you that I mean nothing but to just tell you how much I miss you. I mean well and I didn't know that you're in an open relationship or attached or whatsoever you want to call it. I am seriously sane while sending that text to you. Up till now I have yet to receive reply from you and I don't expect to receive any.

Perhaps this is the thing that made me stay up the whole night without having the want to sleep. Not even the need to sleep. All I did was stare into space, into my dead phone by night and look out of the window. This is ridiculous.

Apart from this the other reason having to present myself a sleepless night is my council. I am having all thoughts about this new batch. Some are just great and some just isn't. Obviously in everything there's always the thorns among the roses and the worse among the better. Well, it's just the beginning and my expectation is high for them. It might sound harsh but it's for council's reputation. I'm on the journey of discovering new leaders. It's tough and I promise, I won't be bias.

My eye's heavy now. I can have a great sleep from now until 4pm. After which I got to bring that little kid to the library and some shopping needs to be done.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

91207616

Revived

2011-04-04T18:12:00.002+08:00

I have no reasons having to neglect this little kid of mine here. Well, after so long I feel that i'm back to who I used to be. Not saying that i'm a changed person totally. Only with certain little things in life that was added or removed to spice up my life a little more. Less did I think about those desire of wanting to blog and to be online in MSN until recently, when someone actually asked for my msn address. It took me quite awhile to give it up. Well, now that i'm back with more routines, at least there's some of this little thing which enable me to spend my time wisely when i'm bored. Than having to be on Facebook all the time stalking people and going through pictures after pictures and trying to change to another display picture.

Life is damn mundane this holidays. What I know, i'm like being confined. To make it sound better, voluntarily confinement it is. This is a great time for me to be lapse from school assignments, council assignments also never ending conflicts everywhere. Simplicity isn't much pay off in Singapore. How I wish i'm in Chiang Mai during this confinement period than having to tell people i'm lazy yet again and again, when they ask me out. That's the best place to slack and wander your time off and the dishes, so simple yet appetising.

I applied for a part time job and i'm praying that i'll be called for interview. I need to change my life more and with perseverance and string will, I am going to make it. (;

Love is in the air.

Grab it and

be fantasized with the way it change you!

Lots of love,

MamaLemon(:

In loving memory

2010-08-16T15:18:00.002+08:00

I personally think that I had died in some of your heart and mind. My presence never exist in your life. Your actions tells me so. The words shot at me also speaks a thousand actions on how much you apprecite me.

Hot News!

2010-07-08T23:09:00.003+08:00

Hello people! Please be updated that I had change my new number. If you are keen enough to have my new number for any purpose, please drop me a mesage with your name to 91207616. Please be updated.

To my guest, I will be online everyday (hopefully) after 11pm for a short while. I will be waiting for your message to my old number too.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Term 2

2010-06-28T20:36:00.002+08:00

Thanks to Facebook I exiled my blog. No worries. I'll update as and when is needed. I won't update daily as I know nobody's following my blog. Why bother right?

Term 2 with a new timetable. Monday got extended 2 hours with additional EIC theory that day and Tuesday starts at 9am and end at 1pm. Why Monday blue's mode end later? *_* Other than that the rest are perfectly the same!

Monday blues and holiday mode still. Did not enjoy my holiday that much as i'm tied up with responsibilities. It's worth it as I learnt a lot about new stuffs. I was freaking tired and sleepy. Still I managed to keep myself awake throught out the day. *bug grin*

My number of children is increasing in the Lemon Family!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

1 Month Anniversary

2010-06-13T15:02:00.003+08:00

Today marks the 7th month we know each other and 1st month together. We went through a lot. From my past experience, this is the most challenging friendship and relationship i'd faced. However, i'm strong and never in my heart blooms the feeling of leaving you. Never before. Although you are very ego and stubborn, I don't know why but I still want to be with you. You are just the someone I was looking for all these years. Now that I found you, I'll never let you go. Since you cam into my life, I feel that life is meaningful and you have been the one I turned to in times of need. You are and still is my shoulder to cry on and a listening ear. I can't imagine my life without you now. It'll be the greatest nightmare. Now that you are mine, I don't want to share you nor lose you. I'd had enough losing you from my life few months ago. Never will I let it happen again. Thanks for all that you had done and sacrificed for me. I appreciate it very much. Thanks for being the very patient person I ever know. Thanks so much. I love you very much.

SC camp commence tmr, 14/06/10. I will be sure to miss my bed, pillow, winnie the pooh and bbylove. Never did I came across this feeling before. I'm very excited too. Tuesday we'll be going to Bintan! Kayaking and all the wet activities! I love water! Hope won't get any sunburnt. Zaynaab and Shireen, let's let our hair down!

I hear you whisper in my ear

All of the words I long to hear

How you'll always be

Here next to me

To wipe away my tears

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Goodbye!

2010-06-12T00:09:00.003+08:00

So gonna miss you babe!

I'm off the cyber world from Monday. SC camp here I come! So excited! It's going to be superduper fun-filled exhilarating activity!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Stop it!

2010-06-08T00:14:00.002+08:00

Stop all the nonsense attitude please people!

1) Flaunt new item when you have yet to settle your debt to your friend and have yet to get a new headphone for me! You're only introducing ill-speakings about you. Before getting new item, settle score with your friend. I'm going to haunt and hunt you down for my new headphone. Consider you my friend when you spoil my items and never mean your words! NBTT!

2) Not happy with the class outing? Confront me. Try me and see your best luck! Class outing is to unite the whole class can? It's still on despite the number of people attenting. I'm not wasting another word about this thing.

Erwan, calm me down! I'm erupting real soon!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

shoulder to cry on

2010-06-06T19:28:00.002+08:00

Having to understand people's problem and help them come out with a solution is just something I love doing. I'm not peeking my nose into someone's problem, but I just want to help out. I just love to help people and when they feel happy, I will, too. However, i'm always in this kind of situation: I'm there when someone need a shoulder to cry on. But, nobody's there when I needed someone to talk to.

This feeling sucks. When i understand your situation, I appreciate it very much that I you understand my situation too. When I say I can help you, don't just throw everything to me. You on you own, try figuring things out. When I offered to help you, I don't need anything in return. But I just need you to coorperate with me.

Bbylove, next Sunday is our day. I really hope I could spend my day with you. Since i'm going on a camp the next day, I just need you to be with me the whole Sunday. I miss your voice, I miss you smile, I miss your laughter, I miss your smell, I miss your warmth, I miss your body and I miss your lips.

I love you, Erwan!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

2010-06-04T17:40:00.004+08:00

Your honesty towards me is at stake.

Why is my guts telling me something is amiss?

Are you hiding something from me?

I just need the truth.

Prove is what I need the most.

Babylove, why am I feeling this way after what I read. If it's not your true identity that you told me, please tell me the truth. I don't mind who you are. What's important is, I want to be with you. I love you.

Prove to me that you are who you told me you are.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Bbylove

2010-06-02T23:09:00.008+08:00

You + Me = LOVE

Bbylove, I need you right now at this moment. I just want to be with you every single minute. I just want to be with you when you're sick, happy and sad. I just want to be the first person to know what's happening to you. Not because I am selfish but I care and love you too much that the feeling is taking control of myself. We might not be like others who meet often, but uphold your faith, trust and love for. Just the same thing I am doing. I know we had been through rather much since we are together, but it's just something that's essential in our daily life. No fight = no fun. True bby? But only us know how deep are we wounded whenever we fight, even over the smallest thing on Earth. You're my life bby. Without you, my life's dark!

Things in the class are just going bonkers! Every group are seriously going against each other and we cannot be united to think or get things done. I'm just trying my very best to unite the class. First attempt is the class outing. I just hope that most are coming. Don't hurt me further people. This is my 3rd attempt in organising this. Stop giving me stupid reasons. I'll ask you people one by one tmr to get it done fast!

As day pass by, school has been boring. No matter what, I am trying my best to enjoy every minute of it. Never did I think of skipping class or not coming for the whole day. Sick and tired of waking up early for school but it's a routine. Got to get over it! (: Perhaps, this feeling came by when friends are behaving differently, showing their true colours and can't even take a stupid joke or take a question too seriously. For these people, I DON'T CARE A FUCK ABOUT YOU! You are just bits of paper in my life for all I know.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Disappointment

2010-05-23T22:55:00.002+08:00

Firstly, I am really sad to see how my current class react with nime and some other's effort in organising a class bbq sometime during the June holidays. I can understand if you can't make it on that stipulated date, but when I asked which date exactly you people think you can make it, PLEASE RESPOND! I hate it so much when I went to the front of the class to get the message across but nobody seem to be interested. If this is how you people respect/treat me, you'll get more from me. Don't ever dream I will be good towards you. I will be sarcastic to the extend that you people cannot take it. Then only you will know who I really am!

Secondly, disappointed with bbylove. Second time we cancelled our meeting. This time is really not the time for us to meet. When he end his training, my family and I want to make a move to my aunt's place. What the F***! Really. I got pissed off with my dad and sister in the morning and with this cancellation, it really made my nerve stretch till it snaps! However, I am really sorry to bbylove that I was being sarcastic to him. I really don't mean it. Bbylove, I just want you to know that no matter how long we never meet, deep inside my heart, my love for you remains the same. I love you!

Thirdly, disappointed with the wedding reception help over the past 3 days. Though it wasn't my close family's reception, I am still disappointed. It's your second wedding reception and the quality is suppose to increase and not decrease. Too many last minute preparation. Overall, I can grade it 4/10. That's considered good.

Time to overload my brain with facts and formulae for the upcoming test which will start on Tuesday. I really hope I can do it. Alright got to console bbylove's heart and do my stuffs.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Mixed feelings

2010-05-18T23:34:00.002+08:00

Early morning late due to train stoppend in Jurong East for 10 precious minutes. Me and Shireen was cursing. At Commonwealth, went out when the door's closing and noticed that Zaynaab went in. *+* Met her at Queenstown in the next train. Laughter filled the empty air. Alighted at Bedok to meet Saidah. Read newspaper in the bus continued in the class with Justin before break and going for blood donation. At function hall, the teacher told me that my vein is 50-50, can donate or not. My hope went doen a little. After check, the nurse told me that my vein is too small so I got rejected for blood donation. Disappointed. Waited for Saidah and Justin. Oh ya. Came with Saidah, Zhi Jie, Kamarul, Justin and me. Eligible: Saidah and Justin. Saidah's vein hiding when the nurse wanted to insert the needle. In the end, failed. Only Justin is successful. Cheat feelings one this donation. I'm very disappointed with the fact that I am unable to donate blood. Went home with Shireen and Zaynaab and there's a lady fell on the escalator and we were cramped at the back. Held back my laughter. Bounces to Pasir Ris and ran to next train at Tampines as it's empty. Laughter filled the atmosphere again. Story2, angry. Sleep and reach home safely. Tmr going together again.

Mixed feelings day. Too many feelings in a day!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Blood Donation

2010-05-17T22:59:00.002+08:00

From my research, I found out that the needle used during blood donation is as big as the BIC pen tube holer. I can't imagine it's width. The pain is as pain as when you pinch your inner side of your elbow for 5 minutes. How true it is, I ain't very sure. Got to see for myself tmr. Some of my friends say it's really fucking pain. Some say it's like an ant bite and it's the same as the pain of blood taking. I'm confused. What I want now, Allah to be on my side and pray that all will go smoothly.

I feel confident in my SC blazer attire without the attire. What's more with the blazer. I'll look smart and will make head turn. hahahaha.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Bbylove!

2010-05-16T17:19:00.002+08:00

This relationship really test us a lot. We had a quarrel umpteen times and it would last for a short time only. However, this shouldn't be the matter here. I understand in a relationship we should give and take, understand each other and have faith and trust for each other. On top of it all, not only me should be the one understanding you all the time. I remembered on the night I was ill. I didn't heard your calls nor messages. When I returned your calls, you are so mad at me. Should it be that way? Fine, at least you apologised. Today, this morning. We are supposed to meet but what happen? You got to work at the eleventh hour. It happened in a split second. You text me asking if i'm done and the minute when I called, you told me you got to work. How sad and disappointed am I to you. For this relationship sake, I will put my trust on you. My heart is telling me something's not right. I just don't know what is not right. It's just that my instinct is very strong about someone lying to me...

Bbylove, I love you very much.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Busy day

2010-05-13T23:03:00.003+08:00

This morning, again I was late for school. I reach class 10 to 15 minutes before lesson ends. At least I showed up. Reason being, I was sick in the morning. I hate this feeling. Lunch break was awesome when me, Saidah and Aepul joined Kamarul and Azhar in the librart to talk cock. Really talk cock! It's different without Mierah around during lunch. Anws, practical was supposed to be 5 hours but, we ended far way too early. 2 hours. Beat record! However, tmr's a busy day.

Sasa...ii...dada, we really can click! I have been loving you since first day of school. I love you. (: Let's be the sweetest les couple in JF1004C!

Lesson from 8.30am to 12noon. There will be fire drill excercise at 12noon. Feels like in secondary school. So people, don't go smoke few minutes before 12noon. 12.30pm, entrepreneur club meeting. Really never expect that I would be selected. With Saidah, my les partner and Shireen, my daughter. (: Maybe it's the way we talk and answer the question. At 2.30pm there's Student Council Team Bonding session. I have no idea what's the attire, kind of miss the information Azhar gave. Oh ya, i got in to Student Council based on reccommendation from Azhar. Thanks bro! Hopefully, tmr no need to tutor. I'm exhausted. Up till now, I got no time to go back to HYSS to take my testimonial. It better be long or i'll create a scene. Mark my words!

I sense gossipgirls group in JF1004C. Better not gossip about me. (:

I miss my bbylove. I will be sincere, truthfull, honest, caring, understanding and won't control you. This I promise you. I love you!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Babylove!

2010-05-12T01:30:00.001+08:00

Bbylove owe me a song. For all I know he's going to sing for me tonight. Soon pls bby. I'm sleepy already. How I wish I can hug you now. Like really now...

School's great and boring tmr. Shorter day and LLA confirm disastrous...

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

NAPHA Test

2010-05-11T00:00:00.003+08:00

Totally late for an hour today. Reason being I had diarrohea in the morning. Quite true. Came in and the reaction from the teachers is really uncalled for. Sorry teachers! Babylove questioned me for being late and gave me a 'wth' reply. ^_^

NAPHA is a whore! Hate it like seriously. There's nothing left to say. I know that I am sure going to FAIL for it. I know it for sure. For the run just now, the weather is rather cooling. I hate the warmness feeling and the cramps all around. For sure, I only pass my Sit and Reach and Sit Ups. (:

Babylove is down with fever, again this month. Take good care of yourself. I miss you like hell and I want to be with you every sec0nd, every minutes. I don't care what you are but you're so true to me. I just love the way you are baby. Let's chat darling!

p.s: saving Adnan Sempit movie for tmr. (:

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Lucky

2010-05-09T14:17:00.003+08:00

Count myself lucky for having to receive the chance to be better. I'm seriously up on cloud nine the moment you talked to me like normal. With no pressure nor angerness. I can feel the sense of love from your heart and I can feel it in my heart too. I am really honoured for having to found you in my life. I'm very sure that we can make it far. Before anything, i'm just confused with myself. I love you very much but I can't let go the other person. I just need the extra courage and assurance from you that you will never leave for and will hang on with me for as long as we can.

I know that I had hurt you numerous times but still, you gave me another chance to be better. I appreciate it very very much darling. Now that I am certain that my love for you will never fade nor will it last. I just want to be with you for the years to come and hopefully till the end of time. Baby, thank you for having to put up with me. You are one guy that I will never ever forget.

I love you Erwan.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Happy Mother's Day

2010-05-08T23:49:00.002+08:00

Siti Nur Amalina wants to wish a very Happy Mother's Day to all mothers, especially my mum, Azizah bte Adbol.

She's the only one who can understand me and know the real me. Thank you for all the things you had done for me and that you for having to forgive me again and again for all the stupid things I did. I'm sorry for having to always trouble you for all this time. I am sure it will all end soon.

School's been great with all the different lectures and practicals. Having to be in school for almost a month, I found the school bored and the facilities are not what I expected it to be. Like for an example, the toilet is really dirty and there's a point of time when the disposable pad bin is not been cleared for 2 days. How gross can it be? Food wise, I love the food over at the cafe near the library. It's worth every single cent you paid for. It's delicious and you'll feel very full after the meal. (:

Classmate's been good. Although sometimes things happen beyond expectation, we still are together. As a class, we're still united. Although not that united but we're working towards it. I'm sure JF1004C can be united by the end of the 2 year course. Class outing better be happening in June!

I miss my baby very much. How I wish I could be with you every night so that I can smell you through my sleep.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

JF1004C

2010-04-17T17:52:00.002+08:00

Talk about school, it tires me when i'm in secondary school. Is it the same routine now? Well, not at all. I don't regret going into ITE, taking the course i'm taking. I know i'm a slacker for a start. But, i'm bucking up right now, at this moment. I'm getting help from a senior, I should say and well have a group study with my classmate. It even beats me when I got to listen in class for something I know. For what I know, i'm still short in class and some younger ones are even taller than me. ^_^

Problems arose as usual, but i'm not going to bother about it as though there's no tmr. I just want to be neutral but certain people just makes me feel insecure and guilty and just all the negatives. People, it's just the 1st week of school, let's work sth out and not be like this anymore. We got to be with each other for the next 2 years. We should appreciate who we are. (:

JF1004C rocks!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

New life!

2010-04-10T03:15:00.003+08:00

Runaway train scene was very successful and very hectic. Awesome Amalina! Now I know who I am in the family. Without me, things tend to go berserk. Although i'm like an old recorder or an irritating feller, I play an important role in the family. Thanks to Macpherson people for the warm hospitality. I'll come over very soon.

School is starting in 2 days time. It's really exciting! New environment, new friends and importantly, fresh new faces, places and routine! 5 years suffering in secondary school, now it's time to suffer in ITE. LOL! I'm not going to suffer. I want to learn, study, gain knowledge with fun! I'm sure I can do it!

Plans on standby! Might torn-ing tmr to Sunday. Go out on Sunday with aunt and head to Macp to do somethings before I finally head home to prepare my stuffs. I need a pack now! 2 days again! 5 days, not at the moment, darling! (:

IzalDarling, i'll wake u up later at 6.30am. Hope we can meet later tonight and torn together. Nononono! I'm going to take care of you the whole night long. (:

I love my new nicknames!!

-budak kecik

-bubbles

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Updates!

2010-04-04T22:53:00.002+08:00

Very long time didn't update. Now's the time for me to do it. Well, although no one's reading, i'm sure it's not a reason for me to blog. Blog is not really something for people to read. It's just something for you to express your feelings without having to point out to anyone, and by chance someone happen to read it. It's an online diary, duh! So I couldn't care less if my blog's popular or not. I seriously couldn't care less! I don't follow up on people's blog, so why should they?

Have been slacking with Macpherson people. They're really awesome. Despite their bad side and stuffs, which i'm not going to elaborate more, they're really warm and friendly. I feel at ease everytime i'm with them. They might not be good people to become my friends. I dare own up that i'm not that good either. You can choose your friends wisely but not according to what they are but it's who they are to you. Well, on top of it all, I love their companions. From uncomfortable to very and extremely comfortable. I'll be doing trips to macp often. So long as you are there. (:

This will be my final week of working at Banquet DTE. I'll miss every single one of you. I can't promise that i'll continue working but i'll promise that I won't look for another job. I'll work if i'm not caught up with school stuffs and when i'm free. You guys will forever be in my heart. (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

BFF

2010-03-25T17:15:00.002+08:00

Girls, let's get our pay together tmr? We shall lepak2 together. Makan2 together. Yes, we just know each other in such short time, but we're like a big family. Am I being so proud by blogging about you guys here? No, i'm sharing it to my own blog. Not to anybody. Not even have the intention to show off. I don't freaking care about what people want to say. Yes, I know you girls are always there for me. This blog need not be so popular as it'll invite fucking irritating readers who loves to give fucking comments and who is such a busy body and reads everything I post about. I love having a blog that's low profile. Oh my, I don't freaking care about FAME! What's there to be proud of Fame? Oh well, ugly people loves fame as it covers all their flaws. All of you are very welcome.

Peace of mind please!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

To whom it may concern

2010-03-25T17:03:00.002+08:00

Stop flooding my tagboard with all the fucking messages. If you don't freaking know for whom my post it, don't be bloody bloody rude by tagging me and scolding me for all I care.

Yes, to my greastest enemy, why should I meet you up? I don't give a fucking care about wanting to sette anymore stuffs with you. You freaking got the wrong clue from my post, you freaking get lost from my blog. What prove have you got to say that i'm blogging about you? Oh you want to slap my face? So be it, let's see who will win. I don't think you freaking know Singapore's rule, you touch me, you lose. Get your laws right before you want to do anything. I know to whom my post is for. You're feeling the post too is it? Good for you. But i'm sorry if this will make you trust me. THAT POST IS NOT FOR YOU! But, if you want to put it that way, the post is for you, so be it. Have it your way then!

TERASE SGT APE CITE? KAU SRG PE IN THAT SITUATION NGN AKU? AKU TKNK LTK NAME PSL AKU TAU LAW. AKU TK BODOH. NK KUTUK2 LTK NAME. AKU MASIH ADE ADAB AKU. AKU TKKN PRNAH NK JATUHKN MARUAH ORG. SKG, KAU NK TERASE KE, APE KE, AKU TK KISAH. APE AKU TAU, AKU TK BBUAL PSL KAU. I LET ALL THE STUFFS GO BY ITSELF. AKU TKDE SMPN DENDAM PD KAU. LANTAK KAU NK PECAYE KE TK. APE AKU TAU, AKU TK BUAT SALAH NGN KAU BY BLOGGING ABOUT YOU. YOU FEEL GUILTY AS YOU DID THE SAME THING EH? AKU TK TAU PLAK EH. PAPELA. GOODBYE MUSUH KETAT AKU!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Runway Train!

2010-03-24T16:00:00.002+08:00

Feel so great being home. However, miss staying over at my bff's crib! Now i'm officially missing Ikka and Q. Yes, work. I want to work. TOgether with them. (: I had enough comments about my far workplace. Hello, it's still in Singapore. Train is in front of my eye and easy for me to travel. Although I know some people might find it a pain that i'm working there, for all I care. I offered you but you're so not interested to join as you said it's super tiring. In life, we must persevere. That's what I always told myself. Anws, I super love the friends I have at work. Way better, and I really mean it that some of my current friends.

Karaoke session with Ikka at Taman Jurong's KTV was super gerek! Let's go again next time? Your treat. Oh nonono! It'd be my treat again and you open bottle. (;

Yesterday's class bbq was superbly unimaginable. I never thought it'd be like that. Anws, I enjoyed my clan's companion by the sea. I love you girls way better than some of my current friends. I just seriously love my workmate and secondary schoolmate way better than my primary school and kindergarten mate. I don't know why but I just super love them. They hate accusers and bitches and some loser and fuckers out there. hahahaha.

IF YOU HAVE THE CHEEK TO BORROW MONEY, PAY UP ON THE DATE YOU PROMISED YOU WILL PAY. HAVE SOME SENSE OF GUILTINESS AND NOT SCOLD ME WHEN I ASKED FOR THE MONEY. YOU ARE BLOODY RUDE. PRANGAI MACAM SUNDAL DA PINJAM TAK RETI NK BAYAR BALEK. TK MALU PE PADA ORANG YANG KAU TK BAYAR? KALAU AKU, NK JPE DIE PUN AKU TAK NAK. MALU LA SIAL!

I can't wait for tonight!
Boy friend's coming over!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Professionalism

2010-03-18T23:58:00.002+08:00

I'm a professional when it comes to work, school and problems. I don't involve my family members when I have problems and never will I interfere in my siblings business. Whether or not they want to add you or delete you or whatever shit. I seriously don't give a damn about what they want to do with my friends. Good terms or bad terms. That's their business so why should I bother? True? Just one thing that will make me interfere in their business. That's only if you shoot them anyhow and bring me in the matter. You guys jolly well know my type of person. When I have matter with you, I don't brag about it. Unless people experience the same thing. That also, I won't shoot you but just share what atually happen and let the people decide what kind of person you are. So far, only you who received this cold treatment from me. You better watch your back every single time. You're no longer safe. You can't expect waht will happen to you next as the guys who had been protecting the girls are already on their look out for you. Yes, you. I'm treating you nothing more than a colleague. People know what's happening and people hate you for not being sincere. You think by recommending me this job you can get me? I'm sorry, you don't stand a chance. Not even a teeny-meeny one. Alright. I'm through will all this. To whom it may concern, apologise to my sister as she doesn't even know what happen. Yes I messed it up too. But i'd hold for too long. Just too long that I can't withstand those attitudes. People, if you love accusing me, backstabbing me, not believing in me and talk bad behind me, carry on. I'm giving you the green light. But just don't let me know it. Or you'll receive hell from me.

I LOVE DTE Banquet!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

I want....

2010-03-18T01:00:00.002+08:00

to love
to be love
to get a guy
to own a license
to own a car
to own a semi-d
to be like by everyone

Anyone want to go smoke with me??? (:

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

FRIDAY!

2010-03-17T00:38:00.002+08:00

Please come early Friday! I can't wait to get my pay. It's a bomb for someone who worked for 4 days. I super love my job. Not the money but the people and work too. It's challenging and i just love it. Problems are talked out and I super love the people. (:

*pictures at work have yet to be uploaded*

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Workaholic

2010-03-14T22:13:00.005+08:00

I'm being a workaholic since I started my new job. I'm loving it! There's no other place I go that I can find people like this. They're one of the best people I met. Though I just met them for a few days, they're my cliques and clan. Problems arouse between us but still, we manage to sit in. I learnt numerous of new things and smoking time or resting time is the best. From being someone shy at first, I became like them. At times I feel odd but they made me feel good. No matter how good they are, they still teach me and help me around. I don't regret joining DTE Banquet. I know i'm new, but if you'er not happy with the way I work, come to me and tell me personally. I won't bite you nor give you a stucked up face. Instead, i'll appreciate you. To say that I can't work, pardon me. I have initiative and I do my best at work and I don't complain when i'm asked to do this and that. I understand working environment and I can blend with different people. Now, give me a little more time to know most stuffs there and you'll see I do work differently. (:

My first fall at work due to Leo. I super love my fall. Funnyfunnylovelycute fall. ^_^

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Work

2010-03-09T23:37:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow till Friday i'll be reporting to Downtown East for work at 7am. I'm wondering if I can make it on time. Nonono. I must make it on time. Despite the distance from home to work, I must prove to everyone at work that I can make it on time and I won't make the distance as an excuse for coming late. I have got to be professional at work. It's going to be a very long day but he promised to fetch me from work. Yes, there's chalet for us to crash after work so that we don't waste anytime but no, i'm not staying over. I'm a girl. I can't be like other girls. I'm someone whose parents are very typical about staying overnight without them. Perhaps on the second day. I'll see how it goes. It's a big event and obviously, I must be on my feet all the time!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Life

2010-03-07T23:54:00.002+08:00

I agree that in life we have the ups and downs. It all depends on how good we can tackle and handle anything and everything coming our way. We must have faith in ourself and also importantly, Allah. He's the one who created us and he's the who gave us the life we're in. He challenge us to see how far and how well we can go and handle all the obstacles he had lined up for us. He's the only one who knows what's coming for us and what will happen to us. This is because, he had planned it way before we're born. It's all written. What's going to be us in the future, is already planned. We can try our best to change our fate but still, he's the only one who'll make it happen. Miracle that happens come from him. It's because je knows that those people deserve it very much. At times, wealth come to us suddenly. This is also his test. To see if we will neglect him once we're wealthy. In life, never gave up. Look on the brighter side and never ever ever blame him. Instead, we should thank him for giving us the opportunity to live in this world. World's ending. It has shown it's sign. I will change. I promise I will.

Random-ness strikes me! Thanks aunts and cousin for the sharing session of your life before and after marriage. Difficult to get this family. (: Gtg. LilBro's unwell. Rushing to hospital!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Work

2010-03-07T23:38:00.002+08:00

First day at work was superb. Though went home with aches, it's worth it! I learnt a lot ytd and working with the 2 guys and the 3 captains are really good. They're very open and often we had our condom talk session. Greatest thing of all was the smoking time. Watching them smoke and still with their story is really cute. (: Came home and Wan load my mind with all the gooseberry stories of the place. Working as a waitress at Begonia Pavillion is great. It's like we're one big family. I'm sure I won't regret joining this job. I regreted not joining it earlier as I followed my friend too much.

Lesson learnt:

Never trust a smn 100%
Never follow what your friend says
Think before you do sth.
Never ever be good to friends.

4th lesson is really true. But, only to certain ones we can be good. At times, people take us for granted and when you shoot them one time, they'll give thousands of reason and will tell you not to turn the story around and end her point. Whatever bullshit it may be, it's life. Let's experience life maturely, Amalina!

Talking session with 2 generation at aunt's place was great just now. Worth the waking up early morning. (;

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

It's all about me......

2010-03-04T03:00:00.003+08:00

I took a personality quiz in Facebook. I'm just doing it out of fun. But it cross my mind to actually post it here, too. I'm done with my soul searching and i'm through with all that comes in my way. I want to stay the same always. Those who are against some of the qualities in me, i'm sorry baby. This is the real me yea. (:

My boyfriend thinks that I am a real doll and this is not a totally positive thing. Sometimes I can be a bit too sweet, and come across as being helpless. If i'm like this too frequently, my boyfriend and other people is likely to get tired of me having to rely on them all the time.

Well, I do agree. But there's a correction to be made. I don't rely on my boyfriend, if i'm attached. I rely on my friends for certain issues like school related stuffs and work. Other than that, I rely most on my parents, family.

You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm.

Self-confidence comes when i'm determined and charm in a way.

Most guys who get to know you will be attracted you.

I better not say anything for this...

You're far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them.

Mmmm....i'm not sure either. But you made me say yes.

Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.

???

You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life.

This is very true. But people don't see it.

You are sincere.

Yes. Everything I do comes from the bottom of my heart.

And your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.

I guess?

You strictly follow rules.

Indeed I am. Or i'll be very worked up!

And you expect other people to be the same as well.

Only those whom I care. Really care.

People can get tired of you easily.

I guess so. That is why at times I don't have friends at all.

As you can make them feel a little guilty about themselves.

No comments.

You always make decisions on your own.

Not always. At times I ask for other's opinion.

And can be dismissive of other people's advise.

You like to be the leader in groups.

Yes! I love to lead!

But can forget to be concerned about the people you are with.

I guess?

Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person.

I'm not sure either.

They will be really attracted to this quality in you.

I have no comments

But you need to learn to speak your mind.

Yes. I need a teacher for this. Please!

Otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet.

Ahah! No! No!

Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes.

In fact I am right now.

When you learn to develop your fun-loving side.

Guys are going to flock to your side.

I hope it's true!

Despite having all these qualities in me, I just find my fate so pathetic. At times I even feel that people just take me for granted and they never appreciate what I did for them and my sacrifices. Out of the many friends I have, only one or two whom I can really count on when i'm in need because they are simply A FRIEND IN DEED and not A FRIEND IN NEED! That saying is very true. Trust me people, everyone will face this and agree to this phrase one day. Dad used to tell me this since primary school and even till secondary school and up to now, working part-time. However, only now I understand the meaning well. It's not my fault it's a matter of when will time tell...

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Funny

2010-03-03T23:40:00.003+08:00

Well today i went to College East basically to get my uniforms, colour test and paying of school fees. Also to get some documents done. It was rather awkward for me. I'm a socialiser but the environment are just different. I went to the NP Red Camp and this registering thingy. I can say it's very different. The way the students are, the atmosphere. I don't know, but it's different. I got to get use to it, though. Everything went very smoothly, except for the uniform.

I'm really shocked that the lady actually measured my bust, hip and waist in the open. Well, in front of those guys. What a shame. I'm not used to it. ^_^ Worse, she gave me 2XL soze for my pants. When i went to the collection area, dad somehow asked the guy to ensure the size. He said, the cutting's rather small. It's alright. Went to pay and tried on in the toilet. Toilet's rather clean. No issue on that. Pant's size toooooooooo big. Alot of excess. Can even take it off without having to unzip it nor open the button. Went to change and asked for XL and L. The guy got it for me and weirdly, in that particular XL plastic it was a 4XL pant. I place it against my waist and wth. It's toooooo big. Toooooo much excess dear. Had a laughing session. Pathetic me. But I gave them a great distress. (:

Stick to L. It's perfect for me. The pants cutting is not big. It's more of a slack, straight cut. Funny I should say. Need some alteration mum! Had lunch and home-d and slept! My eyes are tempting me to close but I want to go out to meet my friend.......Hope I can sneak out...

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Enough!

2010-03-02T20:27:00.003+08:00

I'm not nerve-wrecked or anything. I'm just thinking about this fucking fate of mine. When I had treasured you so much, do everything and anything just to prove that i'm your friend you can count on, this is what I get. I got slapped in the face real hard and oh i'm scared.... No! I ain't scared at all. I'm not like anything you think I am. It's good enough that I tolerated you attitude by doubting that my late grandmother was hospitalised and sent me a freaking long msg to me just to get even with me. You're just smn who don't want to open up and ask/tell people what is wrong and never ever want to get the real fact out of anything before attacking. It's like you're attacking without any helmet nor armour. Boy, I feel sad for myself for having to actually sacrifice a lot of things, and I really mean it, for you. I'm not raking up the past or what, but i'm seriously sad to know that this is happening to us. Eversince that incident, you said I changed. But it's you who made me changed and don't you understand the pressure on me and my situation? Can you stop saying ''don't act as if you and your family is the only one living in this Earth". That's not the point. My point is, DO YOU CARE TO UNDERSTAND MY FUCKING SITUATION? DO YOU FIND IT HARD TO UNDERSTAND THAT I'M RATHER DOWN AND PARDON ME FOR THE WAY I TREAT YOU? DO YOU HINK HARD BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING, OR DO YOU JUST SPEAK YOU HEARTS OUT WITHOUT THINKING OF MY FEELINGS? Yes, I know you have your problems too, your pressure too and everything. But heyy, an you at least for once, have empathy on me? I'm not asking for more but it's just this once. You know me and I know you. Maybe not all but at least we understand each other. Do you know that my heart really breaks when you keep on arrowing on me? You made me ask myself these questions:

1) Do you take me for granted?
2)Do you ever think of the sacrifices I made?
3)Do you appreciate my presence?
4)Who do you take me as?

Answer me this question. I might not be the girl you want me to be. I appreciate all you did for me. From telling me to be hard on people and don't let them boss me around and many more. Yes, in times of need, you were there. We're with each other. But now, what happen to us? Maybe it's the different opinions we had, different way of bringing up and many more. But that's not the problem. We can still be great friends even my parents are strict and your parents aren't. You see, it's just a minor spark that has burn down almost the entire friendship of ours.

Lastly, why must you throw away my stuffs when you're the one who wants to borrow it? Kau ade reti nk berterime kasih tk? Ni balasan kau pd aku? Nk buang2 brg aku? Prangai baek uh! When you need it, I brought it over for you. When you don't need it, I take it from you. It might be my personal item but think dear, would any other pair of friends, borrow their friend those items? Maybe there are, but those type of friends are very difficult to get. Like I said, I don't wish to prolong this misunderstandiong. All I want is for it to just stop and be back as usual. At times, i feel that i'm a fool in friendship.

Babe, marah mcm mane pun aku, aku tkde same kn kau ngn pmnpn kt lorong Geylang. Psl aku tau kwn aku ade maruah dan aku tk akn prna nk jatuhkn maruah drg. Aku nk mrh tkde nk ikut sdp mulut/hati. Betape sdih nye aku org yg aku anggap 'kakak' bbual gini. Worst, it's made public. Oh how honoured I am to have such a worderful friend.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Start fresh!

2010-03-02T20:10:00.003+08:00

Things has been picking up for me. How hard it might be losing you, i'm still standing tall and strong. I'll fight those emotions away from me. I have other people out there who wants to be my friend. I can still live withour you. You are not my everything. You might stole my heart but I took it back from you. You are always smn who means a lot to me. But not anymore. Although there are regrets, well, it's nothing compared to be hurt extremely much in the future.

Anws, tmr i'll be registering for school. This time around, i'm not so hyped up as it's not up to my liking. As you know, I wanted so much to go to either NP or TP to the course i'd been eyeing on since sec 3. However, I got the kind of course only not the type of school I want. Well, obviously there'll be influences and stuffs but I must be strong and put up with all that.

Siti Nur Amalina is now a changed person.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

It's time

2010-02-28T14:44:00.000+08:00

I guess the time has came for me to finally let you go.
My heart hurts the moment I want to let you go.
But, it hurts me more when you don't mean your words.
It hurts me so much when you gave me all the possible excuses just to escape you own grave.
I'm standing strong and proud here saying that,

You're officially off. Please go and never come back.

You were so sweet before this but why must this happen so drastically?
Why must you go with her when you know that i'm always here for you?
Why must you make me leave you in this tragic way?
Why must I cry my hearts out for you?

Yes, I have still a lot of friends out there but to get someone like you...
IT TAKES A MILLION YEARS!

You were my clown.
You were my joy.
You were my happiness.
You were my light.
You were my smile.
You were everything for me.

I will never ever forget 26 February 2010.
Your name will always and forever be engraved in my heart.
I'm proud to say that, you are really not the typical type of guy.
Yes, even after what you did, I still dare to say that.
I had accepted the fact but can any girl out there come to me and say,
"heyy, my guy's so cool. he have the look, the humour and everything that a girl wants."
Importantly, you never ever hurt me when we're still together. Even till the day we end.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

New Life

2010-02-25T22:55:00.000+08:00

Today is the start of my new life. I will do my best to lead this new life well. With the help of my family members, I will definitely do well. Not forgetting my baby who's always been there for me and who always advise me not to act very rashly. I love you baby!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Baby...

2010-02-23T22:03:00.002+08:00

Rizwan, i'm officially missing you.
Really looking forward to meet you.
You are a very different guy i'd ever meet.
You really are different from any other typical guys.

Like I said, i'm letting people say what they want and shall not bother. They'll eventually shut up when they're tired. About that guy up there, yes he really is different from other guys. How I wish met him earlier in my life. Well, this is life, you'll eventually find someone you really adore at the later part of life. Anws, i'm estranged from my friends after my grandmother's demise. Sometimes they just couldn't understand how sad I am. The worse is, they don't even bother to ask if i'm okay and instead keep on having wild guesses about me. I'm not referring to all my friends. Some still are there when I need someone.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Satio!

2010-02-21T23:40:00.002+08:00

I'm really counting on getting a new phone for myself. How I wish I could get that dream phone of mine. Someone offered to get me the phone and yes, I shall just wait and see. I really hope to get it tmr. That's if, you hold onto your words. I took your word, better mean well. At least Satio is quite rare unlike iphone. (:

Sony Ericsson Satio,
you shall be mine in no time.

p/s: Bby, i love you more than you do! (;

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

updates

2010-02-20T16:50:00.002+08:00

I died on my blog for quite some time. Had been over at aunt's place after the demise of my grandmother. I tried my very best to be strong about it. Yes I did. However things doesn't go my way eversince. It ridiculous that shits happen to since 2nd February. Eqa's birthday party isn't good on my side as grandmother is admitted in the hospital in a coma condition. It's hard for me to look after my friend's heart and family's heart when this things happened. For a moment, I felt really lost. Only god knows how terrible I felt. The next day I got fired as I took an urgent leave. I thought telling someone, she would calm me down. Instead nothing came out. I was absolutely sad. A few days later, you doubted me about my grandmother. Do you know how sad I felt. But it's cool now. 2 days later, my grandma's condition got even worse. The doctor called us up to come over to the hospital as there's nth they could do. My family and I stayed up the whole night till her last breath. I felt proud having to be able to recite prayers to her ears. That's my very first time doing it. I was emotional, I know but I can't hold back my tears. Even dad can't held back his tears when grandma's being buried.

Apart from that, I felt that I have no friends with me. Yes there are some consoling me but some doesn't. For now, I shall not bother what people want to say to me, what people want to think of me and whatever they want to do. It's enough that all this while I had been looking after people's heart but they did nothing to me. All they care about is their show must go on. Did they ever once told me that, ''it's okay girl, you family needs you now and I understand you situation." No! Never did I hear this out from their mouth. To think back, what kind of people are they when they put me on a spotlight to make my own decision, without helping me out. Oh my, how pathetic I am having to do a good deed to people and they just dont appreciate it? Well, enough shits here.

Yes, I miss you very much bby. I just can't explain my love for you and how much I miss and love you. Let's savour it all and pull through all obstacles that visits us by. (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

update!

2010-02-08T01:11:00.002+08:00

Since the demise of my beloved grandmother, I had been sleeping at my aunt's place. Helping out anything I can. Life has been moving downstream this few days. Grandmother passed away, got fired and a lot of things to do. Nothing that I regret. Life still move on!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Dismissal

2010-02-03T23:21:00.002+08:00

Your dismissal is a huge loss to the Mohayan's family. However, we feel it's the best thing than having to see you lying in the hospital over 5 days and still fighting and suffer very much. Although you might really want to see your grandchild, he apologise for not being able to attend your burial. He can't get his leave approved. We will all pray that your soul will rest in peace. Lastly, to all those who came and the never-ending condolences I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart, on behalf of Mohayan's family.

Semoga rohmu dicucuri rahmat.

Kamu selalu diingatan.

Norliyah Bte Peer Mohammed.

Sucks!

2010-01-28T14:28:00.003+08:00

When someone assured you very much with the confidence in her text message, and it doesn't turn out the same way, you'd feel like you'd been cheated. All your plans seems to go berserk. Eventhough you are not hoping very much, but you got plans. I wonder what does this people get when they do such a thing? I still have got the time to shop. Babygirl, don't worry i'm sure it'll be done by the date. Just to tell you, she told different stories to different people. How sad yea? She just will get her retribution one day. True?

I'm touching up the stuffs by today and it'll be done and i want to go to window shop with sis today hopefully to see the items t be bought on saturday so it will be hustle-free for me and babygirl. But it's all in the plans. I'm so fucked up with the fact that my pay didn't get processed today. Here it goes; berserk plans!

p/s: Luckily i followed what cousin told me to do, or my application won't be successful like some people. Well, it's still not too late okay. You should have applied for a nitec courses that you have a better chance of getting with the additional subjects u have other than E, M, C.S, C.H and M.T. Now I don't regret a single thing by applying ITE Nitec course. It's better than not getting accepted and not schooling. For this, people have different opinions. That's just what I kept telling myself. (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Cloud 9

2010-01-27T13:10:00.002+08:00

I'm overjoyed upon checking my posting result. Not that I got into any polytechnic but my application for the course i'm so into was successful! Everyone might be storytelling about how happy they are to get into their desired course and so on and so forth. For me, with such results, i'm elated enough to even get a course in ITE, Nitec in Applied Food Science. So what if it's Nitec? I used my N Level certificate to apply for this course. So I don't freaking care. Yes, people might say, i'm a girl of big dreams but never get to achieve it. I will take this as the challenge and I will slowly walk my life up to go into Temasek Polytechnic Applied Food Science and Nutrition. I don't mind how long it is. What matters now, I secured a school for myself and it's not a rejected course or any course people got into and they're dreading. Like some friends of mine who got into polytechnic course which they don't fancy much. Anws, good luck to all! I still have my DAE application to consider that'll be in mid March. If I were to get nursing in NP, i'd be in the same course as my cousin. (:

Alright, got to get ready now to meet bbygirl later. Got to share the happy news!
To all those that has been supportive,
mum, dad, grannnies, aunts, uncles, cousins, Wani, Nana, Khai and Yusuf especially, for having to put up with the negative minded me, when I got my results. Well, thanks very much for counselling me and giving me numerous advices. I'm happy to have all of you around me, then.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Friends

2010-01-27T00:13:00.002+08:00

Let's talk about friends!

In life, obviously everyone met different type of friends. Some might be understanding and be your cliques! Some can just be your friend in school/work and not more than after school/work. Some can be irritating, annoying with fucked up attitudes. Some can be good inside but physically look like a bitch/bad, vice versa. Some can even be a good pretender! You can very well act along with him/her. But, to really find someone whom you can really trust, that he/she will not leak out a single secret about you, is really very hard. Especially in this new era. At times we can really feel like shooting a gun to yourself when you know what's going on.

For me right now, luckily I have my babygirl. I know she's the only one who understand me and my secrets are safe with her. I know she's the only one who will be there when i'm in need. I know she's the only one who will stay with me through the ups and downs of life. Also, she's the only one who won't create any bad story about me; badmouthing me.

However, there's another someone whom I refused to name who have been spouting nonsense about me to babygirl. How can I stand it? But i'm cool and good in putting up with this fatskunk here. She's the bitch fro all I know. Someone who don't admit her fault and LOVE to turn around stories. Don't say something I don't do please! Wait until my limits are up, you'll be done for bitch! You know what, we know the real you. Yes, you do have the good in you but it's a minor arch of the whole circle. How sad to have a friend like you. I officially declare that you're not my friend anymore! I'm sorr but you're no better than an enemy to me now. FYI, you're the one who's been ordering me around and not the other way round. Fine! This Saturday, i'll give you heaven, okay baby? I shall give you the sweetest medicine of all!

I need a stick now!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Recap!

2010-01-24T22:15:00.003+08:00

Today went to work late. It was on purpose. I'm a good worker but heyy! I need a break too alright! At least I don'tcomplain about my workload like as though it's really hell. Yes I do complain and whine, but it's out of tiredness! At least, I don't complain like everyday and rake about it everyday, as though my work load is really too much. Unlike some people who keep on complaining even when she has to wash the party plates. For god sake, grow up! In your job scope, you must assist and we're also told to help each other out. You are just one fat skunk who just love to order and not to be ordered! Now I wll mind and I won't help anyone if i'm extremely as I know nobody will extend help to me!

Enough whining! Well, today was really pathetic. We, the F&B crew don't even get have our lunch like we always do. Well, still we get to munch while on the go! That's the advantage but the disadvantage is, i'll put on even more weight! Today really very tired and it's Joseph's last day. Will really miss his nonsense and his jokes. Sometimes it could be stupid and lame. He gave me a flying kiss. So sweet. Even sweeter when he made me a glass of Hot Chocolate which is extra sweet as he add 3 scoops of the chocolate powder. Well, it's the thought that counts. Hopefully he's not thinking of giving me diabetes. Have a safe journey home Joseph! If you do come back, grab some goodies for us in Fidgets! Will miss you, though at time you are irritating. (:

At a thought, to take care of other people's feelings is really tough and hard. Even if I manage to do so, the slightest little thing can ruin the whole effort. Unable to help someone in need really sucks but when it's my turn in need, it's so difficult to get help. But that girl still stay with me. We stay by each other through ups and downs.

Another stick doesn't kill right?

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Fuck!

2010-01-24T00:16:00.002+08:00

OFF ALL THE TME I MY LIFE, WHY MUST IT BE TODAY?
WHY MUST YOU BREAKDOWN TODAY?
WHY MUST YOU BE UNUSABLE TODAY?
AFTER A LONG WHILE OF LOVING AND ADORING YOU,
WHY MUST IT BE TODAY THAT I START HATING YOU?
I'M SUPERDUPEREXTREMELY FRUSTRATED!

MY LAPTOP IS OFFICIALLY DEAD!
CALL 999/991/995 OR ANY NUMBER FOR HELP!
SOS PLEASE HELP!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Boredom!

2010-01-22T19:47:00.002+08:00

I changed my blogskin for the 3rd time today! This is what happen when there's nothing for me to do. I had always been watching the Growing Up drama in Ch5 everyday monday to wednesday at 3pm and chinese drama at 5.30pm and 7pm. But today only the 7pm drama is available. Thus, I got hooked on the laptop and do anything that's worth doing. Hopefully tonight we're really going out.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

let me out!

2010-01-22T14:04:00.004+08:00

Mum! Let me go to aunt's place! I want to get a haircut for my hair. Why must all this happen like at the very last minute?! Babygirl's fast asleep and tmr i'm working. We just need to do the things today. It's like our VVVVVVIP you know! Aunt's calling me over for some important things, apart for the hair cut. I love the lady who do the hair cut. Seriously, mesmerising! (; I got to think of something this very moment. What's more, cousin's coming over to check out my mum's antic clothes. I don't have the figure to eye on those yet. I shall work out to the max before even having the cheeck to eye on those. ^-^ Anws, mum don't let me out as she's, my cousin, coming over. Aww....That's so sad!!!

Last night's last minute date with Ahmad Taufiq was amazing. Both were actually very awkward but the awkwardness didn't last for long. Great baby! Met him at the nearby playground, pathetic spot so far, and chatted by the side and headed to the nearest park. We did nothing. Really! Nothing! He being the lameshit guy ytd, gave me the lamest riddles ever, which made us laugh through out. He loves pinching me but i'm being the devil last night, only with him, pinched him even before he could do it to me. Then this guy offered me sth but I declined. For my sake, I don't do it in front of guy okay. What's more guy offer me that. Unless you're my guy, it's a different chapter we're looking at. He had 2 while I had 0. On the way back to his bike, he bought this carrot juice. He's a gentleman by offering me the drink. But no, I declined. I hate carrots! So we parted at an area so that I could walk home and he go to his bike to go home. He wanted to send me to my block but it's very late and he parked his bike quite far from my area. I can't bear seeing him finding his way back to his bike. Let's meet up again! Tmr will be in my memory.

Baby, you going to get those from me okay!

I sense that I can go to aunt's place. At night going out with family so must chopchopcurrychop!

I love Sunshine! for making the start of 2010 a wonderful one. A kiss for smn's good! MMMMUUUAAACCCKKKSSS!

Alright! I got to bounce to change my CPF insurer thingy. It's really mind challenging and mum has ben pestering me to change it from Great Eastern to NTUC Income. The more and most common insurance company. Nevertheless, i'm covered under an insurance by AIA. It's really good okay. I ain't promoting or demoting but it's the truth. For a 17 year old girl to comment so much about insurance is a little bit off guard. Shall stop right now.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Last minute!

2010-01-21T20:00:00.002+08:00

Is there such a thing as last minute date? Or rather, last minute meeting? Obviously there is for me but it usually happen to me and my friends. When we're just going with the flow. But right now, it's Taufiq i'm talking about here. I just don't know how true it is. But he's the one coming over and if he played pranks to me, as he love pranks, i'm not at a loss. He better turn up and text me when he's on his way. I shall just pray for the best. It's nothing much to think about and he's a casual friends. I just treasure each and every friendship I have. Alright, I shall bounce now.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Talk about it!

2010-01-19T23:56:00.002+08:00

It's just the urge of wanting to do it. I know it's wrong for me to do it. It's like my advise to those who did it just went down the drain, as me myself do it. Where's the link, Amalina? It's as though i'm teaching a crab to walk straight. When I myself walk sideways. Get that analogy? So now, I don't know if I should stop doing it. Well, it's just the situation which put me into this state. But still, it has nothing to do with influence. Bear that in mind! I do it out of my own will.

For now, i'll just stay with who I am and what i'd been doing. I'lll think about it later if I want to stop it or continue with it secretly.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

fate?

2010-01-19T18:36:00.003+08:00

I got my surprise of the week! Ahmad Taufiq contacted me back. Only I am not sure of my feelings towards him currently. I do feel happy and yes I admit that I miss him very much. He said he missed me too. He's still the old Taufiq I knew. The only guy whom I loved very much. I'm so surprised the moment I called him. Thanks dear, you cheered me up. I really hope it won't end.

Babygirl, sorry I can't come to your place. I just don't have the mood to go out of my house and besides, mum don't let me out. Wil make it up to you another day alright.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

fuck off!

2010-01-19T01:10:00.002+08:00

Third post for the night. NOw a vulgar one.

Why can't everybody just fuck off and lead your own successful life? So what if you got 14? It doesnt' mean you're the best! Yes, you earn your own credit but hello, keep it to yourself. So what if you want that ECH course? So what if you made your parents speechless and proven them wrong? Just fuck off my face and go to that boyfriend of yours who is rather irritating.

One more thing, I DID NOT FAIL MY O LEVEL EXAMINATION. I ONLY FAILED MY MATH. Don't go around telling people I failed my O levels when I said i'm sad upon looking at NP. You have a foul mouth there you bitch! I hate you for that and i'm happy that on Sunday, I did nothing of you instructions. You think I am your slave for you to instruct me to do your load. When you're asked to wash the plates, you simply have too much questions it's as if you have no work experience! Such a fat fucker and look after your boyfriend and stop having scandals behind his back! Be faithful and he can feel it if you do sth bad behind him!

HateMe!
MamaLemon^_^

Bosan!

2010-01-19T00:27:00.003+08:00

Okay, this is my 2nd post for today. This is clearly obvious because i'm bored! Bored to death. Ohoh! Want to know something? I feel like smoking! hahahahaha. That's pretty random anws! I'm getting sick soon! Flu to backaches to coldness to mood swings! Only he can bear with me for this time. I noticed I had not been myself for a week. Due to 2 sad news a day. OMG! Only god knows how I felt. Losing my loved ones and getting bad results. Mum said, god's testing me. Since I made up my mind to not wear headscarf anymore, He test me just a little and I went toppling down and can't move on without taking the lead from anyone. I'm not the independant girl mum used to know. That's what she said. Okay gotta bounce to bed! I need to sleep! Wake me up tmr if you want to disturb me. But be sure, to be my entertainment for the whole time my eyes are open!

Babygirl, get well soon! I want to see the dragon eye you'd had! (;
Eran, thanks for making friends with me bby! Hope it won't stop but will last!(:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Angry?

2010-01-18T22:30:00.002+08:00

Fancy being angry to you own friend just because she did not fulfill her job scope? Yes, that's what happened to me ytd. At closing, I was not allowed to help the partyhost to wash the party plates. In the end I started being sarcastic and scolded a friend of mine. I was really frustrated and you add to my madness. You are supposed to cool me down but instead, you text me that way. Acting dumb and made me shout the f-related word at work. In the bus saw my cousin-uncle. I alight at Clementi and he started interogating me. I was very pissed then. For god sake, it's my life, mind you. It's not that it's very late at night. I have my limits too okay! Went home at 10pm and when I reached my area I sat at this area in between 202 and 204, as i'm on the phone with a friend apart from feeling dizzy. Suddenly came this guy, whom asked me to be his friends. How funny it could be and he guess that i'm 19. Happy nye! Finally someone really though I look matured. (:

Pay day is coming soon, i guess? But i'd plans to the money I made. I love making plans even before I know the actual amount and situations. Well, it's my money. For all I care people!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Appealling in progress

2010-01-15T10:24:00.002+08:00

Wish me luck people! I hope I can get into this DAE programme thingy for the very course in NYP. I hope the supporting documents is enough for me to be selected into the course. Best still, I hope that I will be the only one appealing for this course!

Done with JIE thingy. Thanks to cousin who helped me. Yea, what mum said is very true. I can't move on alone. Not like how I used to be. I only cried and laze around the house. Even at work, Lester was bombarded with lots of questions regarding post O level education. Thanks so much brother!

Finally, a peace sleep last night after few days of disturbed sleep.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Fuck!

2010-01-14T11:13:00.003+08:00

I'd been starting to move on now and why must you say all those harsh words on me. Now, i'm even doubting all the warm and encouraging words you gave me on Tuesday night. Now that you want me to take leave ytd to settle all this stuffs, I did. But ytd my time was wasted just like that. Today, is my off day and you said that we're settling it today. But now, you just keep on saying the time is short and postpone it to tmr. Tomorrow is the last day and everyone will be damn packed about everything. You easily say it tmr just go and they'll apply it for me. How sure are you about that? You keep on calling me a selfish! What about you? Just call your work and say you'll be late? For god sake it's for my education and my future. I wanted to go into SHATEC and you don't allow because of the fees and all. Fine, i'll go your way. But now after much thinking and consideration, i'll just go into ITE intership thing. I shall waste my time, find work experience and more knowledge. Shall I still appeal? Yes, i'm going tmr. At least I tried every possibility for me to go back to school again.

SHATEC is officially out of the topic and list right now. After asking about the programme fees, it's 8K and paid by semester. 1yr 6mths course paid in 3 of 6months. It's super unencouraging right now. Thinking about the kind of income and financial stability we have. We have enough but this is like triple my dad's income. If I were to help, possible, but it's still not enough. Nevermind, don't waste your money here Amalina. I rather use that amount of money to join the make up school, which bitch want to join and at the same time go for my driving license. End of few months, I graduated from the school and own a license. Goodbye SHATEC!

Thank you so much for giving me the encouragement and in the end you demoralise me too! It's very much appreciated.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Confused

2010-01-13T12:45:00.003+08:00

So much for having to do badly for O levels. This is the music you have to face, Amalina! Well, that's really fine with me. I have something in mind but it's just the surrounding that doesn't go with my way. Nvm about that, I shall go your way people! Since my way doesn't work. Dad suggested me to join the ITE internship course for 2 years and to retake my O level English, Math and Food and Nutrition within the 2 year so that once I graduated, I can go into poly with better grades than my first try. It doesn't harm having more than one certificate as long as you're improving and you want to learn. I don't mind going a long way as long as I can be what I want to be.

Firstly, I must go down to NYP to appeal for Food Science and Nutrition. Since I have CCA points and strong foundations of Food and Nutrition, it's a plus point for me to be considered into the course. Maybe it's just a call for me to work harder to achieve what I want. Like I said "No pain. No gain." It's true. Not only will I appeal, I will apply for Nitec courses also. I don't mind where but as long as I can still go back to school, I will. I don't want to work full time. I want to study until I get what I want. Already I am disappointed with the fact that I didn't score for my Food and Nutrition for O levels. I want to get into any food base course. It sucks big time not scoring the subject you had been scoring all the years. Really disappointed. Anws, I got to move on. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed!

Now I must bring back the confident Amalina. Even dad told me that why have I changed into an inferior me? I used to be thinking highly of myself and never did I think lowly of myself and I had always have a big dream and always float whenever I talk about my future. I should float and fly higher and not be demoralise by this. But not anymore since I got my results. It's not that i'm starting to think lowly of myself. It's just that I don't want to get hurt if I dont' get what I want. I'm just extremely disappointed in myself that now i don't even think straight. I just want to be realistic and not only dream. Of all these years, I had been working towards my goal but luck wasn't on my side. Well, I shall not mourn about it for long. I should instead do something about it.

Thanks to my family and friends who have been a good shoulder and whom are of good help. I really appreciate it and I won't let you people down for the second time. Hopefully.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Bestfriends

2010-01-12T20:57:00.002+08:00

You are like a four leave clover.

Hard to find but lucky to have. (:

I want to say a heartious THANK YOU to this sister of mine for accepting my apology and for being there for me when I need someone. You are not a failure baby, it's just the stepping stones for you to become a successful person. Who know's you are more successful than me in the future? You can never tell. But yes, you know how much i'm hurt after being so eager to go into the course and polytechnic I want but in the end i can't. Well, now i'm done and over with the woes. I believe it's fated this way that I should not go into polytechnic. Not this year and maybe it's a call that polytechnic is not my forte or maybe something might happen when i'm in the course? Forget about all that. I must be strong to overcome the biggest challenge in my life. It's really a great disappointment as I never failed in any of my major exams but why this? Obviously there's a reason for everything that happen. Perhaps it is to teach me to be strong-hearted, confident and be prepared for the worst. Not forgeting, to think positive, never give up and think maturely. Well that's about it. Overall, i'm happy for my results. My Malay I improved, from B3 to A1. Other subjects i got a C and a 9 for Math. Nothing for me to regret. I remembered what my teacher told me, "it's no surprise if you fail your Math in O levels."

Baby, aku sayang kau tau! The suspender pants thingy is somtething like that. Similar but not exact. Yes, let's wait for 26th, out official shopping day. Tu pun kalau aku dapat gaji uh. I myself am not sure when I am getting my pay this month. hahahahaha. Alright, got to bounce! I'm tired after a day's work. Although there are not much customer, still i'm tired. I super love today! It's the most relaxing and i met that guy again! He winked at me. But heyy, he's more of a brother to me okay! He's foreigner as well! Last but not least, every worker should be treated evernly. Although he's the son of the GM's friend, that does not mean he's at the privileged to be treated as though he's the boss's son! Hate the bias atmosphere and environment at work!

Loves!

MamLemon(:

2010-01-11T11:52:00.002+08:00

Girl, i'm truly sorry for what had happen twice. I seriously don't mean it. About that guy, his number has been deleted straight after he left me the other day. But after he contacted me asking me to pujuk you to contact him, i saved it. After which he texted me, asking for some stupid stuffs you'd ever imagine he would ask for. However, please we have nothing to do with each other. Now that he made it really clear he won't contact me back and that i deleted the damn stupid fucking message he sent me the very first time we contacted, his out of my life. You know for sure that i'm attached. I wouldn't have done anything bad behind your back to hurt you and my guy. Obviously not. I'm really very sorry.

About the diary, i forgotten the content. However, i'm really very sure that i meant nothing about it. I can't possibly be leaving it lying around if it was a secret for myself. It was something i wrote out of anger and in a state of confusion. I really hope yo will trust what I said. It's not because I lied so as not to hurt you, this time. I regret having to hurt you the second time. I don't mind hurting others but you, Oh No! It's like, i'm hurting my twin sister. I really want to apologise for what had happened and yes, i'm returning you purse to your mum today before i go to school to take my results. Aku tetap sayang kau no matter what happen. Aku betul-betul tak berniat nak lukakan hati kau. This time around, i'm really sorry and hope i'll gain your trust back and give me the chance to mend your broken heart.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

mixed feelings

2010-01-11T11:13:00.002+08:00

Today is the day of my results. However, way before i got the real news, i already got a heartbreaking news. My uncle passed away early in the morning. Although we are not that close, I still cannot forget the times we were quite close. His death made dad, especially, feeling regretful. Regret that he cannot do much as nobody wants to go his way. This is about the on-going problem in my paternal family. I felt sad for his son too. All I can do right now is to donate him a couple or two prayers. May Allah bless your soul, Ayah Uda.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Fucked Up!

2010-01-09T22:38:00.002+08:00

Today is the most fucked up day! Early in the morning a customer made a big fuss over something small. That is; sent order wrongly. Yes, it's my fault. But, she can tell me off politely what! Don't need to say "it's funny right?!"

After that Fidgets became a chaotic place. 5 parties in a day and Tiara isn't there with me. Oh my! How great is that? To think about it, i still manage to pull over. I went home late and shit! that guy looked at me. So long never saw you man! Anws, was the last part timer to go out of Fidgets again. Sad!

Now i'm over at bitch's place waiting for her to get ready as she's sleeping over at my place tonight! I'm your saver girl!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Pics Talk!

2010-01-08T18:16:00.004+08:00

Smiles on my face illustrates how happy i was. Especially with this little boy in red sleeve here with me. He's my boy! He'll sure be a charm to every girl's heart. He's so cute and so sweet. Darwin, if only there's a guy like you who is of my age, i'd be really happy and grateful. (:

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Love!

2010-01-08T17:00:00.000+08:00

Beef Prosperity EVM with Twister Fries is AWESOME!

Changes!

2010-01-08T16:02:00.003+08:00

Alright Amalina wants to talk about changes in her life! (: Sit back and put up with all the upcoming vulgars and nonsense. I shall blabber all the changes in my life . From head to toe.

My hair colour seems to be changing. Soon another colour too. The way i style my hair seems different too. My brain, my mindset and thinking have been constantly changing. It's just the environment that make me change also the inner part of me. The way i dresses is changing also. Well, people do change right? Now that i'm no longer that girl next door who wear the headscarf, it doesn't mean that i'm becoming a bitch. No! Never! It's just something that no one can ever forced me to wear. Let me wear it back sincerely. I know that's a big change for me but heyy, at least i open it up not because I feel warm everytime i wear it nor because of my friends. Unlike some people I know who open it because too used to the life now without heardscarf and wearing it once awhile they feel warm. On occasions, i wear it properly, not lopsided alright.

If people want to start saying "Eh! Amalina's nail is now coloured." For god sake, I know it's forbidden but i apply nail polish/colour due to boredom and it's art to me. My principle is: Anything and everything I do, don't judge it exteriorly. Judge it from the way I see it and my intentions.' My intention is something that only I myself know. I know when to clear it and I know when to apply it too. Stop bugging me to remove it and stuff. Now that i'm working, my lifestyle changed. I sleep late at night, wake up late in the afternoon and laze around at home or go out daily with anyone available. I just feel super fucked up when peopl bite me about coming home late. I understand a girl should not be in the open at night but I am not alone and I am still contactable. Just put up with it now or when it happen later, you people will be shocked to death!

My attitude varies daily. If you irritate me in the middle of my sleep, you'll get it from me. If you shout at me instead of asking me politely, or rather, ask me nicely, i'll shout back at you. Fair game please? You want to be treated nicely, treat me nicely can? I don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings but if i'm forced to do so, i won't hesitate. Lastly, if you found me trying out stuffs that i have yet to do, please, i can try it out now okay. Don't judge me by my innocent look as i'm nastier than you ever know.

Last words from me to whom it may concern. I'm 17 years of age and I want freedom. It might not be full freedom but please let me fly as high as i want. If you think it's too high, pull back the string a little to warn me. But, don't ever jerk the string and give me a shock or the string will be cut and there I go as high as I can be, alone in the world so big.

Amalina! Good usage of metaphors/words/whatever it can be! I'm proud of ME! Next update will be after receiving my results. Oh ya, i forgot to add this on earlier, I miss my kindergarten friends! Just now i chatted with two of he guys named Azfar and Hidhir. All big already and tall. I'm left as a shortie. But nevermind them for not remembering me as you know, guys always have a short term memory especially when they have new and more girl friends. No offence!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

HNY!

2010-01-07T14:38:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year!

Well, i hope it's not too late for me to wish everyone happy 2010! I'd been really busy you know. I'd been working from 31st December to 2nd January. How tiring can it be? You bet! Finally i'm blogging after having my great long rest. I had not been contacting my Bitch often! Only god knows how much i miss her!

2009 ended with a 'tragedy' i shall say to me and bitch. But it ended really soon as we know each other really well and good. Well done to the both of us! 2010 starts perfectly well for me. However, few days after, shitty stuffs happen to me! I really thank you a lot for hurting me deeply again for the second time! You are nothing but just a jerk! Now i know what kind of guy you are. You wasted a lotof my bitch's effort saying all the good stuff about you. I hate yu very much. Just as much as my bitch do! It'd be good if you're reading this. You are a STMF! I love the way you sweet talk-ed me and made me fall into your trap. End up, you win! But heyy! I don't lose to such a hot and cold, touch and go and STMF guy like you! If you were to ever come back to me, i will treat you like a prince. Take my word!

Finally, Monday is O level results! Oh my, i'm feeling super nervous! I don't know if i can sleep on Sunday. Worse, i'm afraid i can't focus on m work on Saturday and Sunday. Oh shut the hell up Amalina! Have faith in yourslef and be confident! I love me! Wish me luck people!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

My bitch

2009-12-29T17:37:00.003+08:00

I want to seriously apologise to you my dear gerl. I know that you already know the truth but do you know that i rather keep the truth than i let it out for i know that you will be extremely hurt. One important thing, you know that no guys are actually worth of our sadness thus, i keep it silent but my way alr show you all. For all the time you want to check my msgs, i allow but why not that night? Well i know how good you can be at times. I just want to look after your heart. You know that you are the only friend that i can ever trust. Not even my family members can get my trust. You are really someone whom god had made for me. He made us reunite so that we can take care of each other each and every day.

Thank you for allowing me to get to know him. I really appreciate it and will cherish the chance you gave me. I will take care of him well and i will not bitch about you. Never ever i did it to anyone else, not even my family nor my friends but maybe to myself. hahahaha. Jokejoke baby! You know how much i love you. You are like a sister to me and i really want to thank you for being the most understanding bitch ever! Nobody can ever replace you. Not even my future guy, husband nor child/kids. See how much i love you baby!

Lastly, i want to take this opportunity to make an announcement to Nur Azwani.

Bitch! i miss you la. I hope we can really ton again but next time not inside my house. So tkseronok! You and me are like the night girls and we like to be together everytime and if possible, to stay in an apartment with only the two of us with no parents, no family. Just us, our beloved idols and our lappy and food and a walk-in wardrobe full of clothes, bags, heels and manymanymany more exciting items. Let this not just be a dream. Let's make it a dream come true! (: On top of it all,

PLEASE FORGIVE ME SINCERELY FOR KEEPING THE TRUTH FROM YOU. I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I DID IT. I MEANT NO HARM BBY. YES, NO GUYS ARE WORTH RUINING OF LONG YEARS OF SISTERHOOD.

You'll get a gift from me next month. This I promise you.

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

The way i loved you

2009-12-24T20:20:00.002+08:00

2009 is coming to an end in matter of days. This year is full of challenges for me. No matter what, I still managed to overcome all obstacles. This year is also a year which have a series of reuniting me and others. Well, i will expand more about this in my long blog post sometime later. Not today.

I'm just reminiscing the moment i had with my ex-boyfriends. All of them. Some are really sweet yet irritating and some are fucking idiot with no package at all. What more can I do when a guy controls my life and everyting I can and cannot do. Well, there are so many guys out there with different personalities. I just want someone who looks like Ariffin and have a personality of Sunshine. Sunshine is good looking but i want both of them that's why I chose this. (:

To make it even, I love Ariffin the most. No matter what had took place, it's just the way he made me smile, laugh and feel sad, disappointed or angry, that made me love him the way I loved him. He's the only guy who know me in and out and felt my greatest love. Who knows the way i cry, laugh, smile and when I feel nervous. He's the only one who know how I had changed from over the years. But, things are not going my way. I had to stop i all.

Boy, you are the one who made me delete your number.
You forget all about me.
You came to me when you are in trouble.
You never appreciate me.
You took me for granted.
You make me became a changed person.
It's all because of you, all this are happening now.

No matter what, even if I found yur replacement, he will never get to feel my love like the way I loved you. You are my light in the dark.You know how much I love you?

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Hanging

2009-12-22T10:49:00.002+08:00

When is the real payday? I am superduper confused. Some say today, some say sometime this week. Some received their pay some have yet to receive and make a total big fuss about not getting it and call people askng about their pay. For god sake, calm down and refer to the manager! Disturb my beauty sleep. My pay isn't that much though. Afterall, working for 7 days and get around 400+? To think about my family, i don't know how much will i be left. I must give some to my family, not to help them but as a form of gift. Enough of pay day. Staff outing is still unconfirmed. Maybe part timers are not invited? Who cares.

You left me hanging and i am on my wits end. Now that you know my answer to your question, you better be true to me. I don't even wish to know the truth from other people or even myself. I want the truth to be coming from you. Only your identification card can prove everything about you. Let me just say this, i miss having you in my life, i miss how i used to inform you about my whereabous and yes, i miss the way you make me smile.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Start anew

2009-12-21T22:56:00.003+08:00

Dear bitch,
Thanks for staying with me through my ups and downs of life. I know its hard for you to understand me at times and at times we tend to have different perception about something. However, you are still the best. No one can ever replace you. Only you know the devil and angel side of me. You are my best bitch ever! I love you, Nur Azwani!

For you:
Thanks for betraying my precious trust. The truth might not come directly from you. Thanks to her i know who you really are. You are just someone who pretends to be somebody and turn around your story which does not sync with your previous stories. Next time, you want to lie and create story, prepare a few storyboard or you'll be living in the world of your own lie and your story line will be in a mess. Total mess. I want to wish you the best of luck in you lying world!

Pay day is coming! Just in time with Christmas sale and Year End sale! Family is my top priority, obviously! After that then can i only shop with my bitch up there!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Biasness

2009-12-17T18:53:00.002+08:00

It came to a point that i must highlight how bias the refree for the football match of SEA Games. His biasness can really be seen and Young Lions just keep pn getting yellow card. Today's match, one of the Laotian should get red card but he managed to flee off without even getting a yellow card. How terrible can this refree be? If i have the authority to sue this kind of refree, i would already did. Not just because of Young Lions just keep on getting yellow card. It's just that these refrees doesn't come into terms with the rule of the games. Yes, he can foul the players and so on. But, please be fair to both parties. Even if you're on favour for one of the team.

However, Young Lions played the best game today! I super love the way they defend the ball, refraining the Laotian to score a goal. Not till the 80th minute or so, when Laos clinched their first goal. Poor Hyrul got injured and the man who injured him didn't get penalise. Safuwan and Afiq got injured too. Safuwan received 3 yellow card so far and i can tell these youngest Young Lion batch are really good and they can and will maintain these quality and with more trainings, they are able to go further.

You woke me up in the morning with three miss calls before the fourth call. You just won't give up calling me until i pick up your call. This shows how sincere you are and you just love my morning voice. ^_^

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Mess!

2009-12-14T22:14:00.000+08:00

I am fucktrated with my life! Having to be a hypocrite and not working on weekdays. How un can my life be right? I am just lazing around at home or meeting my g other than working on weekends. How boring can it get? What's worse is i have to face you and treating you as if i don't know you. I really hate it that way and sometimes i couldn't help myself but to talk to you, especially ytd. I also couldn't help myself to stop thinking of you and cry upon reflecting on what had happen. Boy you know how to turn your words and put the blame solely on me. How irresponsible can you be? I am just an ordinary girl who tend to do mistake. But when you say i am a problem to you, you know just how much i am affected and how much I am disappointed in you. If you think I am a problem to you, boy, you are 10 times a problem to me. Luckily i have my gf on my side. To think about my family being by my side when this matter rise, i am wrong. They just can't be discussed with. Not even my parents, siblings and aunties.

I am just pissed off when i share my story to someone and you will say "oh you one pathetic chap are in some trouble", when we are having a family storytrlling session. This just means that i can't tell you my story and i won't dare tell you ever again. Back at my workplace, if i were to know who breathe a word about what i informed them, you better watch out! The most i will have a slow fight with you. You are not making things work on my side, instead, things are getting worse. And, fancy you saying 'hi' to me upon seeing me at the stairs. Those smiles on my face for you are fake!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Boo!

2009-12-10T00:28:00.002+08:00

After 8 days of silence, here i am! It's been tough for me to blog and update my facebook nowadays. Wani, my gf, is always updating it for me. Thanks gerl. Pdhl, kau ade agenda laen. That's between us yup? Anws, work is not tiring but problems are always there. Well, problems are never-ending. True? It's how i act to put up with all these shits. I'm through you and my life is picking up again. Thanks so much for saying me a selfish and doing a two-way traffic. You are just one guy who acts to be a noble guy. In this new era, no guy like you can stay for long. If you choose to treat me like that, so be it. Although my working environment is very much affected, i'm perfectly fine to be a hypocrite just for you. Only you, nobody else.

My Haikal has been behaving superduper sweet. Gerl, klau ade jodoh la kn...hehe. *inside agenda*. My life changes since i know you. Thanks boy, for changing my life. Anws, this few weekdays have been out with my gf, Wani, and came home very very very late at night. Always catch the last bus and get nag by parents. For once, i'm 17 and i know how to take care of myself. I have been working very hard on weekends and at least let me enjoy my weekdays, for as long as i can. It's really tiring lazing around at home doing nothing. How i wish..Forget it!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

New life

2009-12-02T18:09:00.002+08:00

Friday is the start of my new life. It is when i started working at Fidgets. I was super shock with the loas i need to clear. Though it is a public holiday, i sacrificed my holiday. After work went to Ami's place as my family are gathering there. After which had a chatting session then off to Nenek's house at Woodlands. There, we had a cake cutting session as it was Mak Busu's birthday and mine is on Saturday! Had photo taking session too. I'm in love with Darwin! (:

My cake was cut at 12 midnight! Finally i'm 17 baby! Saturday, my birthday, i was working too. Some wished me and kitchen crew kind of sang birthday song to me. Only the last line. But the thought that counts yea! I super love Saturday and Sunday as it was the day i'm not really packed. Especially on Sunday, i can laugh around and joke around and get bullied by Zul and Helmi the two guy who is in the F&B line with me. Two guys with 2 different personalities. They can drive me crazy at times. Now i'm missing work!

Never did i expect love triangle to happen at my current work. Came to know about the news, i was super shock. Never ever i expect such things will happen. Untill now, i'm missing my work. The pay is rather high. Most sales and f&b line won't be generous to give such pay. Problems do occur anwhere even here. Lucky me, i'm not much affected. (: Pictures will be uploaded soon i hope. Too busy to update my blog and facebook.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Double Happiness

2009-11-24T17:42:00.002+08:00

Yes! Finally secured myself with a job! It's at Fidget @ Turf City. Hell yea, the place is very ulu but the working place is so cute. With lots of childrens and the atmosphere makes me feel young! The pay is quite good to. However, i'm still looking for a weekend job. It's like working for 3 or 4 days a week. Found this job too. It's like a hotel banquet and the pay is more or less the same as Fidget's but the pay is weekly! Can be rich every week! The money won't last long but still i can help myself to stuffs every week. (: Tmr's the interview for the hotel banquet and Friday is the orientation for the Fidget! I'm so excited. Anws, baby's away for camp. Back tmr's night. Aku rindu kau la seh! Appreciate this last chance or you will regret ur entire life! I'm rather sick now. Wani knows how sick I am. Every other minute with a tissue, rubbing and making noise. (:
Now i can have a really goodnight sleep. Found whata i want but to get it started and to make it work requires another hardwork. Moreover, i felt belittled when she said 'EXTRA'. Just one word and u made a friend think bad of you.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

It's like

2009-11-23T01:23:00.002+08:00

I'm an adult now! Went for wedding reception to accompany my mum only. Whilst, taking my food, this Kompang guy, like disturb me. Pass plate to me and look at me kind of thing. I just laugh as they are like kids! Not honoured ok! There, i super love the wind blowing my hair! (: Wearing pumps in malay traditional clothes, made me feel awkward! (; Worst is, i got nagged by my aunt. She say not that i don't have any heel, why don't i wear it instead? lol! (:
Went to aunt's place and had a great chat. Topics to topics we changed! Really great! Made me feel like an adult. The adults were like talking all about life and life. I learnt a lot! (: It was great! Camwhored and sadly, pictures are all with my aunt. ): Anws, i will try my best to get it and will upload it! I super love my hair today!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Insomnia

2009-11-22T03:45:00.003+08:00

Nice leg! haha!

I love this!

Rocker sesat!

I miss the time i wore tudung.

I super love this shoe!

These pictures were uploaded due to boredom and i just want to add live into my blogging world! (",)

I rested enough i guess that now i can't even fall asleep. I'm still thinking what to wear later to go wedding reception. I just wanted to tag along as it's been a long time since i went. What i know, i don't want to wear my heels. I want to try out wearing my pumps in malay traditional clothes. (:

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

I miss...

2009-11-22T00:30:00.006+08:00

Red Camp 6.I miss the campers, the student leaders and the school! The food isn't that awesome only on the 2nd day of lunch where we had spaghetti and brownie. I super love the brownie! Yummy! Now that i'm searching for other course that i'm interested in. To maximise the 12 choices. I just want to be optimistic for time being. Before the release of the results. I never failed any major exams and i hope it won't be a history this time. I'm really praying very hard that i will get through this phase!

Ariffin.Yes, I have been thinking about him most of the time. The people i randomly met just remind me of him. Their way of talking, walking, laughing, smiling, hairstyle, dress sense and just many more. I'm just superbly annoyed to be disturbed by this! I don't know what to do right now. I tried my best to forget about him but suddenly i face this kind of thing! I think he is for me but somehow, it isn't. I know how warm he was towards me and how i started to treat him coldly when i thought about the impossibility of us being tohether. Now, i'm suffering. I guess, i;ll get over with it once i found a job.

Life.

I miss my life. Really. How busy, stressful, sad, elated, nervous and many more i used to be. I love being involved with the school sports event, lower sec inter-house competition and many more. I just hope teachers will remember how i used to be when i need to undergo all this. Especially when i was the one who need to settle down the students when none of the sport leaders are seen. I hope my leadership skills will be more developed in the years to come.

Having a guy.

I want to be in a relationship. I crave for being love, cared for and pampered. I want a carefree life with my guy. I want to be like other people who seem happy with their partners. I can't tell myslef not to look for 1 now. It's just the temptation of wanting to be loved, cared and pampered. I'm not materialistic or what but, it's what most girls wants.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Tired

2009-11-20T15:36:00.002+08:00

I'm super dead beat! Today is the day i rest and i just woke up. ^_^
I don't know how i will stand if i got into polytechnic and come home late at night and wake up early the next day. However, Red Camp 6 was Awesome and Vikings are Sexy and Horny! Though it hurts my throat shouting, I really love it! The 'zouk-out' thingy was just so GREAT! But some people are just getting so wild. Nvm, now it's time i start looking for a job. (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Missing him

2009-11-18T23:20:00.002+08:00

Why am i always thinking about him and some random guys i saw just look like him? The same forehead, hair and body type. Arrgh! Why must this feeling bother me at this point of time? I feel hopeless as i cannot do anything. Not even trying to contact him. I deleted his number. Yes, i really delete his number the other day. I was just feeling super angry with him as he didn't reply all my messages. At times i blame myself for acting too rashly however, i always tried to calm myself by saying that he's not worth my love. At times, i feel stupid, because of how i treat him last 3 years. He said
"if you're like this then, i wouldn't have left
you."
Oh my, i need a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on.

Is this a hint for me to start doing something useful to forget him or maybe i must try my best to squeeze out my brain juice to remember his number again? Perhaps, it's time for me to really get a replacement. I need an answer. What should i do? I'm really on my wits end now. Obviously suicide is not the solution! Never! I guess, i really need to do soul searching.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Pre Prom Night!

2009-11-15T23:01:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow's the big day! I'm doing my final touches before putting out my stuffs for tmr and take my rest! Oh ya, i should hae something for my classmates, i suppose. (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Freedom!

2009-11-12T12:51:00.002+08:00

Life is great now! Now that i don't have much problems and stress, i'm free from all the down side of life. However, i'm still finding a job. If i can handle i will find at least 2. Not greedy but this is how we make money! Though i am not fretting over how badly i did for O levels, it's all done and cannot be undone. So why must i bother? It will only add to my grief. I love mum and dad who allow me to dye my hair! (;

Now that i'm contacting you back, why must all these things happen whenever we want to commit? It's a pain in my heart haing to compromise. Yes i made a promise to you this morning but now i'm considering it again. I just can't stand having to put up with such situation.

To compromise is fine but not often and always. I do have my limits too. Anws, life is like this i guess? Whenver you got something you crave for, something you don't like will happen. For me, when i got my total freedom, i have to compromise it with you! How could you? I'm sorry, let's just not commit and let me lead my own life and don't restrict my freedom!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Peak!

2009-11-10T22:59:00.003+08:00

Finally i had reached the peak of GCE O Levels! Tomorrow is the last paper that is Sciene Paper 1 and i need to score for this so that it could help pull up my paper 2, which i did quite fine. I'm in the Prom mood! All seem to be going my way. I almost got all the things i need for Prom Night 09! Hopefully before the end of the week i got the stuffs i want! I'm going to look elegant and won't be overly-dressed! Let's just see if some people will be overly-dressed.(;

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Quotes

2009-11-05T18:38:00.003+08:00

A very great encouragement quote for everyone out there. Always remember this as i'm very sure there will be someone out there, which include me, ever think of wanting to giv up whenever you think you cannot do it. This will be something to guide you to be a successful person!
"When you feel like giving
up, remember why you held on for so long in the first
place."

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Life...

2009-11-03T18:29:00.002+08:00

Sometimes in life things don't go your way. I should better say that things always don't go my way. However, at times things unexpectedly go my way.

Well, to start of i shall extend my greatest thanks to the one who set the Chemistry O level paper. I was so shock to know that the questions are not as difficult as how Mr Soo always gave us. Let me make this assurance, teachers tend to set difficult and hard questions so that their student will crack their brain juice. It's an advantage for us, students, as we never know how hard the question might be. Right?

Currently, done with 4 papers. Anws, my confidence level to pass Math and do good in Chem seemed to increase a little. At least it increases yea? What i want now is to do veryveryvery well in Geography, Biology, Malay, Food and Nutrition and Science Paper 1. This few subjects are my forte. (: However, at times this subjects made me disappointed. I shall just do my very the best!

What's important now, i just want to finish off my paper and not brood over how bad i did and get out of Secondary School life! Prom Night is i 2 more weeks. Preparation is not done yet. Only managed to plan over some issues. Well, should be getting all the things I need within 12th to 15th. After Prom, look for a job and only then i can call myself a big girl! (:

MamaLemon(:

In love!

2009-10-30T00:12:00.002+08:00

Sony Ericsson Idou!

Sony Ericsson W995!

Hope to grab a new phone end of the year. Something new to get a head start of the New Year! I'm aiming at the Sony Ericsson Idou. It's 12 megapixel and touch screen. It' a little like the Samsung touch screen. Well, it's cool! With a touch of silver and it'll make me stick to it every second! Sony Ericsson W995 is also great. It's like the normal W595 phone. It's colour is just wonderful. It's like wooden colour of black and red. How coolSOME is it right? To get the phone, i must do well in O level and get a job after that. So that i'll get it for sure! *fingers-crossed*

Currently done with 2 subjects! It was fairly done. The lowest i can get for this 2 subjects are 5 and highest are 4. Hopefully to get a good aggregrate so that i can go into the course i want!

MamaLemon(:

Ewan said:

2009-10-26T23:04:00.002+08:00

All the best for your paper.

Never give up.

Strive for the best.

Ewan will always be supporting you from behind

and will aways support Amalina to strive forward and be successful.

Since he wished me late, he apologised and said that this is meant for all my other paper. Actually the thought that counts la dude! Anws, thanks for having to be there through my downs and all your useful advises are put into place. We may not know each other for a long time but the chemistry between us just made us feel very connected together. I miss u dude! Take care of yourself and hope u'll be happy with me. He is such an aodrable dude, with positive attitude and never fail to cheer me up. For that,

I love you, Ewan!

MamaLemon(:

Family Outing

2009-10-25T23:32:00.003+08:00

Family outing was better than ever. Went to Sim Lim Square to grab some stuffs and went around looking for my items. Bought my laptop's cooling pad. Thought of buying laptop skin to give my baby a new look. But i don't ly like the designs or shall i say, i'm not ready to make my 'VAIO' words dissapear by sticking the new skin.

Went dinner to somewhere new. Initially i thought it was a non-Halal stall. But looking around, there are many malay families around. I took a long time to order my food and like often, my drink finished before my noodles was emptied. Ordered another drink and i can't finish my noodles. That's so Amalina! Bought my Caramel Frappucino over at Starbucks. Those guys just don't seem to know how to do it. ^_^ But it was coolsome!

This morning woke up with a heaty stomach and vomited a few times. Thanks to Ewan for his great advise that i'm feeling a lil better. I just hope it will be over soon. Tmr's English paper and hopefully it'll be good! I shall depart now for my filght later. (:

MamaLemon(:

New look!

2009-10-23T01:29:00.001+08:00

I'm happy with the new look. It looks refreshing and i super love the song! (:
Hope it's easy for reading. Left with a few stuffs before i really call it my most updated blogskin! Lappy's dying soon. Got to go now!

Good Morning Earthlings!

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Practical Exam

2009-10-23T00:13:00.003+08:00

I'm not going to be the next or rather last person on Earth to fret about my Science Practical. What's done cannot be undone. For the first time i can't understand what the question was asking. I mean for Chemistry. What bubbled through and stuffs. I just did what i think make sense. For Biology, it was manageable. Although i forgot how to get magnification, i didn't leave any blanks. That's good enough. I still insert an answer although i don't know. (:

My thumb is so hurt as i touched the hot boiling tube, which i had dry clean using the fire to continue with my practical. However, thinking that it had cooled off i touched it and OUCH! it was burning hot! The 2 hour of quarantine, was fully utilised. I managed to catch up with my friends. (:

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

(500) Days Of Summer

2009-10-20T00:52:00.001+08:00

(500) Days of Summer was a Great movie! It gave me a different perspective of life and relationships. I super love the movie! It's worth watching! (: Wanted to watch The Ugly Truth or Phobia II, but, Mazri was underage! Only me and Melissa who managed to pass the movie. LOL! To be fair, we watched (500) Days of Summer. Really fun and it exercise my stomach! Next i'm going to watch The Blue Mansion. Local Movie. Seems great! NC 16 again! (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Oops!

2009-10-14T22:52:00.003+08:00

Wasn't expecting Nurul to be disqualified. But it's competition. There's only 1 winner. Sezairi melt my heart! Seeing his tears goes down his cheek, made me want to cry along too! In my mind, i think Sezairi can make it! He really can. Ken said he has his originality, sth that other contestant don't understand/posses. It's a big chance for u! (:

Studying has been rather smooth. Eversince sis made a timetable for me, i became more and more disciplined. Studying at night really made me concentrate and stay focused! I hardly feel sleepy and i feel like i'm an owl. However, things will change a week before O level. Alarm clocks will be all around me, to wake me up. I don't want history to repeat itself.

Muhammad Ridhwan,
believe me that i won't let you
go.
I will hold onto you for as long as we can
be.

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

addiction?

2009-10-08T22:48:00.002+08:00

I'm addicted to this game called Luxor something. It's something which i'm required to match 3 or more similar tiles in order to finish the level. Must break the 'barrier' (i don't have a better term for it). While playing, i learnt something, i can relate this game to my life. In the game, we must dare to take the risk. The risk to select which tile go first. In life, we must take the risk to choose what we want to do for the future. If we choose wrongly, we will fail. Though failure is the path which will lead us to success, if only we know how to take the positive side of our failure. Apart from that, i learnt that i must complete the level within the stipulated time. Failing to do so, i need to restart the level. This means that, if we take things lightly and don't want to learn, we'll be doing the wrong thing again and again. (:

Baby, i miss you.

Baby, i love you.

Baby, i promise you that i won't leave you.

Let's face all the challenges going against us.

We can do it together.

I love you Muhammad Ridhwan!

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Nonsense

2009-10-05T16:31:00.002+08:00

One of a person you are!

How can you tell me to forget about the class photo? This is my last year in school and the last year in my secondary school! I'm just super annoyed with this kind of attitude. You don't know what's my reason for not coming to school and still tell me to forget about it? Oh well, the photo are nothing to me now! I swear that i won't come back to school not until O level! For that, i have no choice! You are just a hypocrite! My parent's don't even like your GREAT ATTITUDE! Call yourself a teacher for doing all this?

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

coolSOME!

2009-10-05T01:12:00.003+08:00

SUPERBLY
FUN!

That's how i can describe about today. Though i joined the group late, i still managed to be overwhelmed by different feelings. This year was better. Far way better. Though my friends(girlfriends) can't make it and some won't come, i didn't feel left out. The people are just very coolSOME and i super love everyone! This year is just veryveryvery happening! Now i want the pictures! *wink*

I love my seating buddy's companion! He was a real gentleman! I didn't know that i, we, actually did what we did. Super UNPREDICTABLE! Whatever it is, we're both are fine with it. So nobody's feeling weird. I just hope it won't stop. I love the way my seniors tease/disturb me. Forever they will disturb me, especially Fathil and Firdaus! They're just coolSOME people to hang out with and to have them as my friend is already an HONOUR! Though sometimes their jokes are really nerve-wrecking and hurtful, i'm seriously not taking it into my heart! (:

O Level is super tired now! (my new nick, thanks to them!)

Loves!

MamaLemon(:

Condolence

2009-10-02T15:52:00.002+08:00

Condolence to Nadzierah and family for losing a precious
family member. I'm always by ur side. You can come to me if u need help. Be
strong! *hugs*

Never could i imagine having to lose my mother. Especially when she is the one whom i love the most and who understand me very much. The news i received from u made me cry inside. It's true that my drean has relation with u! My dream was great untill an hour before i woke up. I started dreaming about a family member of mine, who passed away. When i woke up, i saw ur msg: 'my mom just passed away'. I could hear the sadness and could feel the tears coming down ur cheek while sending the msg to ur friends and family members. I will pray that everything will be going very smoothly and i hope u and ur family will not face any problems. I'm always here for u! (:

Loves!
MamaLemon(:

Philosophical GURU!

2009-09-30T23:16:00.001+08:00

I'm on my final
sprint. I won't look back. I won't think ahead. I will just live by
the moment and study.

Special thanks to Yusuf, for giving me this constructive, practical and great advise!

Loves!
MamaLemon(: